For once in our adult life, we’ve all been Ginnifer Goodwin once. If you’ve seen He’s Not Just That Into You, which I so happen to rewatch now and then, you’ll know nobody misreads signals more than Gigi— whose hopeless romantic ideals and wide-eyed naïveté puts her feelings on the line rather than actually saving her. But in the end, it turns out, she was the exception. In reality, for many of us, we’re just not the exception at all.
We’re just the foolish ones.
If you’ve got a minute or two to spare, I’m going to spill some hard pills to swallow. Bitterly so, they’re hard truths.
If you are overanalyzing whether somebody wants you in their life more often than not, he’s just not that into you.
If it feels like they’re putting one foot in and the other foot out, he’s just not that into you.
They compliment you— call you pretty and amazing, but not enough to gather the guts to take you out and pursue you, well, he’s just not that into you.
If they casually disappear then pop right back into your life for the heck of it, there’s no epiphany there— they didn’t wake up one day to realize they’d missed out on someone amazing for letting you go. Nope, he’s not just that into you.
If you think they have the potential to improve the next time you communicate with them but still ending up to be having no ounce of effort into really knowing you, he’s just not that into you.
If they only ever cause you stress and confusion, there is a big possibility it’s just fun and games at this point and nothing sort of serious. He’s just not that into you.
If you have to water yourself down, shrink yourself a little to match their energy, he’s just not that into you. The person who actually wants you, gets you.
Let’s just say when you know what you want, you know in every fiber of your being that what you want is something you want to have. You do your very best to attain it. The complete opposite of that is just apathy or worse, tolerance. If they are casually making you second-guess everything which results to you feeling like an option in their long list of other choices, he is just not that into you.
I guess it takes time to gain some perspective for moments like these. You grow up and realize some things just aren’t working the way they’re supposed to be. You cannot always be chosen or loved and valued the way you want but that’s not the end of things. Trust that you will get your chance. You will have your shot at this thing called love. But if the signs are way too clear, you have to learn that the best way to move forward is to recognize them— be a big girl and say, nope, I don’t think I have to live with this. You have just got to live your life and fit yourself in places and people you belong without forcing connections that will only make you feel some sort of regret in finding out that honey, they’re just not that into you.